Back for a moment to invite you to visit this blog.
sauceywench.blogspot.com

Life is interesting and surprising. I'm optimistic. This year has been full of life changes. I will get to that. But for now. Take a moment to visit Izzy Blu and Bubbles LaRue. I kinda like them.
J

Update...trying a new thing

It's been a long time since I last posted on here. My apologies. I do have some nice things to add as I've been trying to explore what is right around the corner. (without the cobwebs) I've become an amateur photographer. Surprised? Yes, me too. I don't have a fancy camera. All my photos are taken with my cell phone. (A 4S iPhone, in case your interested)  I've always loved taking pictures, of people, nature, interesting-unique things. One day a friend said...What don't you post this on a photography site and see what kind of feed back you get. Brilliant!  I didn't realize how my confidence would build. I've met new people on my adventures, realized I have a self worth that I didn't have before. Now, mind you, they are not all good, but even the bad ones make me smile. I did that. I DID THAT! On my own.  I traveled to a place I've never gone, found the beauty and have immortalized it.  Memorialized it? Anyway.... I will continue to hike, drive, explore the corners of this beautiful country we call the Pacific Northwest and you can tell me what you think. Pointers appreciated...except for "buy a new camera".  Carry on.

In Olympia WA. Pretty cool building don't you think? It was right by the Starbucks...most things I find are right by a Starbucks.

Long Beach Washington...I love light houses. This is probably one of my favorite pics

Morning fog in Woodland, WA. Really, it is beautiful ...and slowly rolls in eventually enveloping the whole area. Eeeeeeery. Natures cobweb??

But the next day...this beautiful cloud formation.

Lovin' the country. I think those trees on the hill look like the ones from Lord of the Rings. I expect them to start walking down soon.

thanks for visiting. More photos to come as I adventure on....

Sharing Gifts

I have always felt that each person is given a special gift. For some it is the loyalty they display in each friendship they acquire, for others it can be a great smile, the ability to make people laugh,being able to do a math problem without taking the class, being a great athlete, knowing when someone needs comfort, or one of those people that just...helps. I have always labeled myself as "the entertainer". I provide entertainment in many forms to those around me. Sometimes it is with chatter in an otherwise silent room, sometimes its making people laugh, other times it is to be a listener, sometimes it's making those comments that everyone is thinking but no one will say...(oops)  and then there's that gift of music.

I've been having this feeling for several years that I need to be sharing it. Not wanting, but needing. Not in the form of on stage with a mic, although I have done that, but just sharing.  I no longer really want to be up in front performing. I much prefer singing with friends just because we want to. The other evening I got a chance to do just that. A couple friends and I got together for a wonderful lady who is a hospice patient. We sang songs she picked out, songs others picked out and just enjoyed the night. 2 1/2 hours later....I walked out exhausted, but joyous.

 I had looked around to see the banjo player with the talented fingers pickin' out a tune, the guitar player who knows every song out there and plays with ease. Their wives, and children joining in. The wonderful lady on her last moments in this world holding a downs baby who fell asleep to the music in her arms. I looked at my very good friends who are guitar and piano players and wonderful singers and thought...wow...this is what I hope the next chapter of my life brings.

I was right in that I need to share my own gift.

When my father passed away I would play the piano and pretty much just read the music and follow along. Shortly after he was gone I felt this urging to fill in between the notes. I start adding things here and there and soon these songs became... me.  At some point I had tears running down my face as I heard my father say "that's it. Keep going".  Now I know that when I sing it's a part of me, my father and the gifts he shared (violin, mandolin, guitar,mouth harp, harmonica and singer) that molded me into who I am. I did need to share. I DO, need to share, present tense. I need to share for me, to bring smiles to others, to appreciate those around me and start filling a spot in my heart that has been aching for quite some time.

God gives us talents that we need to expand I guess. In order for me to fill full, I need to give. And that's what I intend to to.

Book 2

Today my youngest daughter received her graduation announcements. I guess it's final now. She is going to graduate and I will be an empty nester with all four of my kids off on their own. Did time really go by that fast? It seems like not so long ago that I had one child racing on her horse long curls flowing, a son mastering the art of southpaw pitching, the next child falling in love with every animal she saw and then this last one, toddling along behind everyone, fearless.  They have all started their own adventure and now, I guess, it is time for me to start my own. I'll be creating my own little bucket list. A list of realistic things. No bungee jumping for this girl. Crazies. But I may save money to go to Hawaii, or get back into singing, join a Zumba class, take an art class, spend more time at the lake, work on the landscaping or get back into growing flowers for my friend D. My life is no longer on hold. Maybe that isn't the right phrase because I don't regret it. Not for a minute.  I think I will look at it as one of those books that says "book 2" right in the middle. Now.....where to start....

Billy Joel - Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel)

Memory of a father

Every Mother's Day I think about my father.  I remember all the Mother's Day's we had as kids and the things my dad would do for my mom. When I got older he would do those things for me. Buy me flowers, show up with a Rhodie or Rose bush for my yard. Sometimes it was just a candy bar, sometimes earrings. You never knew. Always a hug and kiss. I miss my dad more than I can say. I envy those who have their fathers into their own ripe old age. I have some friends who lost a parent at a young age and I am grateful to have had mine father into my twenties. But that doesn't stop the ache.  Recently on Facebook friends added their mom's picture in honor of Mother's Day. I added both my parents.  I found myself  looking at the smiling face of my father and a flood of memories came crashing in. It was nice to know that I hadn't forgotten how he looked, his laughter or his voice. It makes my heart flip flop to remember some of the teen memories and young adult memories. I sure could of used my dad's input and support on some of the adult life decisions I've had to make. I really think my life would of taken a different path if he had been here. Or maybe I would of ended up in the same place without so much heartache. who knows? Anyway, I came across a Billy Joel song that I hope one day will be how my children feel about me. As it is how I feel about my dad.

I didn't intend this blog to be sad or wistful. Nor did I intend "Cobwebs in the Corner" to be a therapy session. Sometimes things could out of our fingers that we have worked hard to seal in our brains. : )
Here is a list of things that remind me of my dad. Feel free to add your own.

Music

singing
laughing
working in the dirt
large sunflowers that are 8 feet tall
old vehicles
overalls
the smell of just cut grass
a breeze
Old Spice
"tut tut smells like rain" (and it does)
suspenders
dimples
warm hands
smile lines
a warm house
the Christmas tree lit up when I wake up in the morning

just to name a few...

how lucky I am

I just got done watching a video on Roger Ebert and his loss of voice. He has had Cancer which robbed him of a jaw bone . After several bouts with reconstructive surgeries failing and other complications he ended up with a  loss of voice . He is quite interesting, jovial and his sense of humor suprised me. He, through other people, said some very profound things.

All of his got me to thinking...how lucky am I.  I have dealt with some sad, disturbing and sketchy things in my life and sometimes even allowed myself to drown in a pitty party. Luckily, I had family and friends who were patient and caring. They allowed me to find my own way. It has been tough for sure. But so enlightening. I have not had to deal with any physical tragedies. All  my tough spots were my own doing and I have since learned that it doesn't matter what you do you can always make a choice to change your choices, if that makes sense.

I have a voice. I intend to use it while I can. To help lift other people, to express an opinion, to say things of value, to yell for my kids at a ball game, to tell my family they mean everything to me. I will not use it to benefit my own temper or to devalue another human being. I keep thinking...if today were the last day I had a voice...what would I say? What would I sing? Will anyone listen?